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Compassion and Forgiveness Increase Through Nervous System Regulation
In a fractured world where social media and even some world leaders often model division rather than compassion, and where asking for forgiveness can seem increasingly rare, we may wonder how to nurture compassion and forgiveness. While these qualities are often viewed through spiritual or psychological lenses, emerging research suggests they may also arise from a regulated nervous system. Evidence from a recent study in Rwanda indicates that compassion and forgiveness may be strengthened when people restore a sense of safety, balance, and well-being within their own bodies.1
Human perceptions, emotions, and behaviors can be profoundly influenced by the state of their nervous systems. When individuals are overwhelmed by fear, chronic stress, or trauma, their ability to connect with others can become compromised. Survival responses such as fight, flight, or freeze (withdrawal) focus energy on self-protection. This is not a moral failing but a reflection of human biology (not pathology). Under conditions of threat, the nervous system prioritizes survival over connection.
This understanding has important implications for societies recovering from collective trauma. Communities affected by war, genocide, pandemics, political violence, natural disasters, or historical oppression often experience not only individual suffering but also fractured relationships, mistrust, and strained social bonds. The challenge becomes not only how to help individuals heal, but how to restore connections to family and the wider community.
My connection to Rwanda began in 2016 when I traveled to Tanzania to train a group of young Rwandans in the Community Resiliency Model (CRM). During our time together, our shared vision became clear: accessible tools that could help people understand the impact of trauma on the body and strengthen well-being in everyday life, to help people carrying the wounds of the 1994 Rwandan genocide.
The young Rwandans created the Rwandan Resiliency and Grounding Organization (RRGO), a grassroots initiative dedicated to bringing resilience-focused skills into their communities. Among those young leaders was Dr. Sam Habimana, who had recently completed his undergraduate degree in psychology from the University of Kigali. His passion for helping his country heal was evident. Alongside his colleagues, he began bringing CRM skills into rural communities where survivors and released perpetrators live side by side, often carrying profound emotional and relational wounds decades after the genocide.
For Habimana, this work raised important questions. Could a biologically-based intervention such as CRM contribute not only to individual well-being but also to broader social healing? Could skills that help regulate the nervous system foster compassion, forgiveness, and social cohesion in communities recovering from genocide?
Increases in Social Cohesion, Compassion and Forgiveness
Driven by these questions, Habimana pursued advanced studies in the United States, earning his doctorate in 2025. His scholarship contributed to one of the most significant studies conducted on CRM to date. His work was recognized internationally, including acknowledgment by the International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies (ISTSS), reflecting both the quality of the research and its relevance to the global trauma field.
The study examined the effects of CRM among genocide survivors, released perpetrators, and mixed groups composed of both survivors and perpetrators. Thirty years after the genocide, participants struggled with trauma, grief, mistrust, and disrupted social relationships. Yet following CRM training, researchers found significant improvements in social cohesion, compassion, forgiveness, and resilience across all groups.
Perhaps most remarkable was the finding that participants in mixed groups—in which survivors and released perpetrators learned together—demonstrated meaningful improvements in social functioning. The results suggested that collective healing can occur even among individuals whose histories are marked by profound suffering and division.
Resilience Essential Reads
These findings suggest that helping individuals regulate their nervous systems may create physiological conditions that support some of humanity’s most important capacities-compassion and forgiveness. Compassion and forgiveness become more accessible when chronic activation of the nervous system connected to fear and threat lessen. Social cohesion becomes more attainable when individuals experience greater safety within themselves and greater connection with others.
The implications extend far beyond Rwanda. Although cultures, languages, histories, and traditions differ, human beings share the same fundamental biological architecture. Whether we live in Rwanda, the United States, Haiti, Ukraine, Northern Ireland, or elsewhere, our nervous systems function according to the same basic principles. We all experience stress. We all experience threat. We all possess innate capacities to cultivate our well-being, healing and human connection.
This universality is particularly important at a time when the world faces unprecedented mental health challenges. Millions are living with the effects of trauma, violence, displacement, poverty, natural disasters, climate-related stress, and social fragmentation. At the same time, there are not enough mental health professionals to meet the growing demand for services.
Community-Based Approaches Promote Well-Being
The findings from Rwanda suggest that scalable, community-based approaches such as CRM can help address this gap. CRM is not intended to replace psychotherapy or specialized treatment. Rather, it offers practical wellness skills that can be shared through schools, healthcare systems, humanitarian organizations, workplaces, faith communities, and grassroots networks. These skills help individuals understand their nervous systems, strengthen resilience, and manage stress before problems become more severe.
Importantly, resilience-building programs work best when integrated with professional systems of care. Individuals requiring more intensive support can be referred to trained clinicians, while communities benefit from widespread access to preventive and restorative skills. This public health approach allows resilience-building and mental health services to work together in complementary ways.
The lessons emerging from Rwanda are about what becomes possible when individuals reconnect with the wisdom of their own bodies. The Rwanda study suggests that compassion, forgiveness, resilience, and social cohesion may also be strengthened when people learn skills that help regulate their nervous systems and restore a sense of balance and well-being.
The young Rwandans gathered in Tanzania with a vision for helping their country. Their efforts led to the creation of RRGO, the expansion of resilience-building programs throughout Rwanda, and research that is now informing the global conversation about trauma, healing, and social cohesion. Trauma can spread through communities, but resilience, compassion, and hope can as well.
