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Combining complaints and bragging online is sometimes referred to as “humblebragging,” when people boast under the guise of modesty or a complaint. It allows individuals to highlight their successes or positive traits whilst appearing embarrassed or complaining. For example, someone may post a question such as, “Why is it that I always take on too many things at any one time?” Or, a statement such as “It is hard, I give at least 8 radio interviews a week.” Humblebraggers hope to generate responses that reflect their competence and some applause.
Humblebragging is a common social phenomenon often used on social media. However, it does not have the effect that the humblebragger is hoping for.
Why humblebrag?
For most people, bragging is not something positive. Thus, when you want to brag, you may feel uncomfortable about it. This is known as cognitive dissonance, a mental discomfort when we think something we are doing conflicts with societal norms.
Even though self-promotion is not uncommon on social media, people feel uncomfortable with it, as their culture values humility. Whilst they want to let others know about their achievements, they worry about potential hostile responses if people think they are bragging. Humblebragging allows people to relieve the tension and concerns by using modesty to present their self-promotion. Even though the reader often perceives it differently.
Not an effective way to present yourself
Social media is often used to seek approval from others. The aim is to get as many hearts or thumbs-up as they have connections. However, such positive reactions are less likely if you humblebrag.
Humblebragging can be perceived as insecure, insincere, and manipulative; those reading the post are left unimpressed or annoyed. On Instagram, it has been found that people rate humblebraggers as less likable, less competent, less sincere, and more narcissistic than people who are straightforward and complain or brag.
Thus, there may be a social cost to posting content viewed as inauthentic, as it can create trust issues that are sometimes irreparable.
Sincerity matters
People prefer that others be honest rather than disguising what they mean. Straightforward bragging, even if not favoured by others, is at least honest. In the last few decades, it has become apparent that being authentic is important. For example, brand authenticity is synonymous with successful business practice, and consumers want influencers to be authentic. People don’t like it when others try to deceive them.
Humblebragging wants to walk a fine line between pride and humility but often achieves neither. In the end, people value honesty and vulnerability far more than an overly polished attempt to mask ambition. By trying to please everyone, humblebragging often pleases no one, leaving a trail of missed opportunities for genuine connection and admiration.
Be honest
Engaging with others through social media can be tricky. But at any point in time, it is better to own your achievements and be honest about what you have done. That way, others can, if they wish to, genuinely congratulate you on who you are and what you have accomplished.
Equally, it is a good idea to share the potential difficulties that you may have faced on your journey to accomplishment. This can make what you share seem more relatable and vulnerable, just like anyone else. Also, discuss how you have grown as an individual and mention others who contributed to your success. Not only does it demonstrate that you have not always been successful, but that you can recognise those who helped you get there. Something that can be uplifting for anyone who was involved.
Humility brings you closer to others; it shows how you are authentic and don’t need to pretend or disguise what life can really be like.
