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The rising popularity and public awareness of consensual nonmonogamies is a double-edged sword for many people in CNM relationships. On the one hand, more public awareness translates to greater discrimination because some people view CNM as a rising threat. On the other hand, the significant upswing in public awareness and number of people engaging in CNM means that more people are advocating for equal rights and protection against discrimination. Currently there are no legal protections at the federal or state level for CNM relationships or for many other forms of relationship diversity.
Discrimination
My own and many others’ research has uncovered significant stigma and discrimination against people in CNM relationships. At the personal level, this stigma can mean that individuals in CNM relationships are ostracized from their families of origin, expelled from friend groups, and excommunicated from their religious congregations. This is not to say that everyone who engages in CNM experiences such difficulties, but research indicates that a significant proportion of people in CNM relationships experience some kind of negative social fallout from the relational nonconformity.
While such social stigmatization can have significant and painful emotional consequences, it is slightly less likely to have the financial consequences that outright discrimination holds. Discrimination facing people in CNM relationships crosses personal and social boundaries, ranging from pressure to conceal nonmonogamous relationships and “relationship invalidation” to lower access to adequate mental and physical healthcare, as well as housing and employment discrimination.
In a 2025 community survey of people in CNM relationships in the United States conducted by the Organization for Polyamory and Ethical NonMonogamy (OPEN), a staggering 61% of respondents reported that they experienced stigma or discrimination based on their CNM relational status, with almost 10% of them reporting housing discrimination. That same survey found that the other most common forms of discrimination against CNM folks are found in unequal deployment and treatment under federal services (8.5%) and employment discrimination (6.7%).
Protections
Given that such experiences of stigma and discrimination can make people vulnerable to negative personal and social outcomes, community members in CNM relationships are advocating for protections against mistreatment. Similar to members of LGBTQ+ populations who have struggled for decades to gain rights equal to those of sexual majority populations, folks in CNM relationships are attempting to stimulate the development of laws and policies to shield themselves and their families from harm.
Since 2023, when Somerville, Massachusetts, made history by being the first municipality to craft protections for people in CNM relationships, momentum towards equality has been building. Other cities have taken note and passed similar measures, including Cambridge, Massachusetts; Berkeley, Oakland, and West Hollywood, California; Astoria and Portland Oregon;* and Olympia, Washington. While the scope of protection varies from city to city, the provisions usually cover city services, employment, public accommodations, and real estate transactions. Cities currently considering passing similar non-discrimination policies include Seattle and Tacoma, Washington; Eugene, Oregon; and Hazel Park, Michigan.
Grassroots organizing is gaining momentum, and OPEN has developed a toolkit that offers guidance for people seeking to further such policies in their own area. The free online tool-kit offers advice on how to identify allies, an overview of the legislative process, how to find a sponsor for a bill, potential challenges that might face organizers, and tips for how to conduct the campaign itself, including ideas for troubleshooting, messaging, and outreach.
Brett Chamberlin, executive director of OPEN, sees the future of community organizing on behalf of equal rights for CNM relationships as both urgent and achievable. ‘We’re at an inflection point. The mental health toll of stigma and discrimination is well-documented in our research, and now we have a roadmap for reducing that harm through policy change. City-level wins are building momentum toward state protections, and each new ordinance sends a clear message: non-monogamous families deserve the same dignity and legal recognition as everyone else.
*In full disclosure, I testified before the Portland City Council on behalf of the nondiscrimination proposal. Also, while I am not a member of OPEN, I have contributed to their fundraising efforts.
