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Co-authored by Amy Vigliotti, PhD, and Sorel Roget, MBA, CPC
The move from high school to college is one of life’s biggest developmental shifts. It brings freedom, opportunity, and excitement, but also anxiety, homesickness, and uncertainty.
For many students, it’s the first time managing daily life without parents nearby: choosing when to study, what to eat, and who to spend time with. These growing pains are normal, but without guidance, the transition can feel overwhelming.
As psychologists, educators, and parents, we can help students navigate this pivotal year with more confidence, balance, and self-awareness. Here are three evidence-informed areas that can support a smoother, more successful first-year transition.
Normalize the Experience: You’re Not Alone
College can feel like an anonymous and intimidating place at first. Students often assume they’re the only ones struggling, but nearly everyone is experiencing some challenges, even if they are beneath the surface. Recognizing this is powerful. The first few weeks are a swirl of introductions, orientation events, and unfamiliar routines. Encourage students to remember: awkwardness and uncertainty are part of the process, not signs of failure.
Even small acts of connection can ease the transition. Saying “Hi, I’m [your name]” to a classmate, joining a club, or attending a residence hall event can open doors to meaningful relationships. Many students, especially those who are socially cautious or nervous, are relieved when someone else takes the first step.
This first semester isn’t just about grades or friendships. It’s about self-discovery. Students who connect with their “why” (their purpose for being in college) feel more grounded and resilient. Whether that purpose is academic, creative, or personal, it can serve as an anchor during rocky times.
Build Structure and Seek Support
The shift from a structured high school schedule to the relative freedom of college is often disorienting. Classes may meet only a few times per week, leaving long stretches of unstructured time that can quickly fill with stress or procrastination.
Here are a few strategies that help students regain balance:
- Get organized early. Use a planner or app to map out exams, assignments, and deadlines. Visual structure reduces anxiety.
- Plan around your energy. Schedule demanding classes or study sessions when you’re most alert. Avoid cramming your schedule with back-to-back commitments.
- Explore, but pace yourself. It’s OK to drop a class or step back from a club that isn’t the right fit.
- Use your campus resources. Many students don’t realize how much support is available: free therapy, academic tutoring, financial aid offices, health center/gym, food pantries, and student wellness programs.
- Perhaps the most important skill? Asking for help!
Students often think independence means figuring everything out alone. But resilience isn’t about doing it all on your own; it’s about knowing to whom, how, and when to reach out. Whether emailing a professor, meeting with an advisor, talking with your roommate, or calling home, help-seeking is a mark of maturity and self-awareness.
Create the Experience You Want
Every student’s college story is different. There is no one way to “do” college. Trying to match someone else’s version of success, or an idealized version of success, can lead to burnout.
We remind students: You don’t have to fit in; you can belong by being yourself. Social pressures can feel intense, especially early on, when everyone is eager to connect. But saying no to things that drain your energy is just as important as saying yes to opportunities that align with your values and interests.
Some students find it helpful to make socializing part of studying. Meeting friends at the library or for group review sessions can help stay connected and build new friendships while staying focused.
Students should also allow themselves to explore. That might mean trying an unexpected course, volunteering, joining a research project, or rethinking a major. Curiosity and flexibility are the building blocks of growth.
A few reminders from current college students:
- The friends you meet first may not be your lasting circle…and that’s OK.
- Introduce yourself to professors; office hours can lead to mentorship and opportunity.
- Keep your door open (literally or figuratively) to new connections.
- Expect ups and downs. Adjusting takes time and courage.
Growth Takes Time
No two students will experience the first year of college in the same way. Some adapt quickly; others take months to find their rhythm. Vulnerability, risk, and uncertainty cannot be avoided, but the good news is that they lead to authentic, strong relationships, self-trust, and learning.
For parents, educators, and mental health professionals, the goal isn’t to remove discomfort but to help students understand it, sit with it, and grow from it.
When students reflect on who they are, act with intention, and allow themselves to evolve, they lay the groundwork for lifelong resilience. College is so much more than a place to earn a degree. It’s where many young adults learn how to become themselves.
